Mar 15, 2010

The Pink Eye Scare of Twenty Ten

After my sister and mom suffered through pink eye I was unhappy to discover my right eye was itchy, oozy, and unhappy. It annoys me that I would have pink eye for the same reason it would annoy me if I got the chicken pox. I'm not high risk. I don't have kids. I'm not around kids. I don't spend a lot of time with people with kids. As my hateful doctor pointed out to me there is no reason to get a chicken pox vaccine if I'm never going to be exposed to it. AND YET MY EYE HURTS. It's mother natures cruel trick to point out to me I don't have my own children. I hate that b**ch. (That line couple of lines made me laugh out loud at my desk like a crazy person.)

The worse part of maybe/probably having pink eye? Having to wear my glasses. Now my glasses have never really fit me because I forget to take them with me when I go to the eye doctor so that could be the ACTUAL problem. STILL HOW DO YOU GLASSES WEARING PEOPLE DO IT ... AND WHY? You realize technology is on your side and contacts/surgery are now an option. They even have these awesome contacts you keep on your eyes 24/7 for a month before just tossing them and getting a new pair. I used them for over a year and LOVED them. I had the sight of a 5 year old. Perfect. Sadly my eyes are so horrific I had to change to a type of contacts that doesn't allow for that 24/7 option. That doesn't get around the fact that very few people actually HAVE to wear glasses now. It's Twenty Ten people. Let technology work for you.

Here are the problems with me wearing glasses:

#1 I forget I have glasses on NOT sunglasses and constantly get caught starring at people.
#2 I forget I have glasses on NOT sunglasses and when I drive into a dark place (like the garage in my office) I take my glasses off to see better only to become immediately blind and nearly kill myself.
#3 I put my ear piece on while driving (so I can multi-task and talk on the phone) and knock my glasses off one ear. Result is similar to #2.
#4 I can't wear mascara, the only staple in my make-up armory. If I do my eyelashes hit my glasses and just go all wacky and smudgy.
#5 I can't run, swim, hike, bike, or do Bar Method with glasses on because I get so sweaty they slip off my face and I become blind again. How am I supposed to train for this triathlon with glasses on?

So I've given up. Pink eye or not I'm putting my contacts back on. SUPPORT TECHNOLOGY!

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